Money
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
Always borrow money from a pessimist-they don’t expect to be paid back.
I can’t stand cheap people. It makes me real mad when some-one says something like, ‘Hey, when are you going to pay me that $100 you owe me?’ or ‘Do you have the $50 you borrowed?’ Man, quit being so cheap! — Jack Handey
I got a good tip from my stockbroker the other day. He said, ‘For only 39 cents, I can super size those fries for you.’ –Jay Leno
I started out with nothing… I still have most of it.
I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer. — Jim Carrey
I wish the buck stopped here. I could use a few.
It’s easy to sit there and say you’d like to have more money. And I guess that’s what I like about it. It’s easy. Just sitting there, rocking back and forth, wanting that money. — Jack Handey
Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy. – Groucho Marx
Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons. – Woody Allen
The government is now going to hand out rebate checks to try to restore confidence in the U.S. economy. The bad news is, half the people want the money in euros, and half want the money in pesos. — Jay Leno
Today was actually a very lucky day for me because I woke up this morning, and I got an unbelievable e-mail. Apparently, a Nigerian prince left me $47 million. And all I have to do to claim it, is pay a $500 filing fee. So you won’t have me to kick around anymore. — Jimmy Kimmel
(No Ratings Yet)
Loading ...
Leave a Reply