Nam's One-Liner Jokes

Egotist:  A person more interested in himself than in me. – Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary, 1911  
 
I don’t have a big ego, I’m way too cool for that.
 
One nice thing about egotists: they don’t talk about other people.
 

A friend in need is a friend to dodge.
 
A friend in need is a pest indeed.
 
A man is known by the company he avoids.
 
Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. — Ambrose Bierce
 
Familiarity breeds contempt – but without a little familiarity you can’t [...]

According to a study, they found common words used by happy people are, joy, love and hopeful. And they also found common words used by other people to describe happy people. Annoying, irritating, obnoxious… — Jay Leno
 
Happiness, n. An agreeable sensation arrising from contemplating the misery of another. – Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary
 
Happiness is having a large, loving, [...]